Jealousy
Ruining Relationships
Many
themes can be found in Khaled Hosseini’s book The Kite Runner, with one of many
being jealousies role in destroying relationships. The main character Amir, a
young Pashtun boy born into a wealthy family in Kabul, loses many relationships
because of his own jealousy. Amir grew up in a life of luxury with his father,
and eventually became best friends with his servant’s son, Hassan. Although
Amir and Hassan were best friends Amir always was jealous and envied the fact
that his own father liked his Hazara best friend more than his own son.
Additionally, when Baba began to help build an orphanage Amir was jealous of
his father’s focus being on orphaned children rather than his own son. Lastly
Amir is jealous of Hassan because he has always been a better person than him.
He is loyal and would do anything for Amir, but Amir would never do a thing for
Hassan. Hosseini shows how jealousy turns relationships sour through Amir’s
reactions to Hassan’s loyalty, and the care Baba shows for his orphanage and
Hassan.
Throughout
The Kite Runner we come to see that Hassan is a boy full of loyalty
and respect towards Hassan and his father. No matter what the situation is,
Hassan will always put those who he is loyal to before himself. The best
example of this is when Amir won the kite competition and he needed to get the
kite that he knocked down to gain respect from Baba. Hassan went out to get it,
but he was confronted by the bullies who pick on him and Amir. He had to choose
either to give them the kite and betray Amir, or let them rape him. Hassan
chose Amir because he would never betray or put himself before him. Amir was
never the same kind of friend to him. When Amir realized that Hassan, the
Hazara boy was smarter than him he purposely started teaching wrong definitions
to words to make Amir look better, “I read him poems and stories, sometimes
riddles – though I stopped reading those when I saw he was far better at
solving them than I was,” (Hosseini 30). The fact that Hassan who is a Hazara
boy, who has little to no formal education is still smarter than Amir is
humiliating, “Sometimes jealousy can be a consequence of high self-esteem that
make another person's behavioral flaws more apparent in comparison to their
own.” (Olivia Petter). When Amir’s high ego of himself was attacked by Hassan
being the better person, morally and intellectually he could not handle it.
Amir’s jealousy results in him undermining their relationship when he actively
tries to hamper Hassan’s learning to make himself look smarter.
Amir
has always been jealous of Hassan for multiple reasons, but the strongest
reason was Baba’s preference for Hassan. All throughout Amir's life, he sought
acceptance and love from Baba. He was never able to achieve that because Baba
only saw a disappointment in Amir
and a reminder of his wife’s death while giving birth to him. Hassan is the son
of Baba's servant and yet him and Baba always got along. Amir despises this
because it made him feel less respectable than even a “Hazara”. Early in the
book there is a very good example showing Amir’s jealousy. “'He asked me to
fetch Hassan too, but I lied and told him Hassan had the runs. I wanted Baba
all to myself” (Hosseini 12). This quotation reveals that Amir doesn't want to
let Hassan get any attention from Baba, and he wanted him all to himself.
Another good example
of Amir’s jealousy of Baba’s respect for Hassan, was when Baba said, “A boy who
won't stand up for himself becomes a man who can't stand up to anything”
(Hosseini 20). Baba said this about how Hassan stands up for himself and
doesn't let people stomp all over him, unlike Amir. Amir would never be able to
stand up for himself due to his cowardly self, resulting in Hassan always
having to stand up for him. Many children become jealous easily when their parents
give attention to someone other than them, “Some children have a more jealous
nature than others and will be prone to comparing what they receive, attention
from parents”. (Jodey Braverman). Amir felt jealousy that Hassan, unlike him,
was able to gain the respect of Baba. Baba respected Hassan's loyalty and
bravery, both traits that Amir does not have. This jealousy results in Amir
doing anything possible to sabotage Hassan’s relationship with his father by
telling lies about Hassan, which ends up damaging his relationship with both
his best friend and father.
In addition to Hassan, Amir always
felt jealous to anyone who was able to get Baba's attention. An example of this
is Baba’s helping to build an orphanage for children. Amir could not stand the
fact that Baba was giving attention to random orphan children more than he was
to his own son. Amir was so upset that his father was spending time with the
orphans he said, “I already hated all the kids he was building the orphanage
for; sometimes I wished they'd all died along with their parents"
(Hosseini 19). This shows how selfish Amir is, and is shows how rooted in
jealousy he is. Just because the kids that have no one in their life are
spending time with Baba he feels that they should “die along with their
parents”. Amir’s main goal was to find the missing love and acceptance from his
father, he was always so unsure about his father feelings towards him. When
Amir was in a kite flying competition he said, “was he cheering for me? Or did
a part of him enjoy watching me fail?” (Hosseini 67). Amir’s mindset of
believing his father hates him causes him to hate and wish terrible things to
people who do get Baba’s respect, such as Hassan and the orphan children.
In conclusion, “The Kite
Runner”written by Khaled Hosseini, portrays how jealousy can destroy even the
closest of relationships. Amir’s relationships with his father and his best
friend are strained because of his deep jealousy. He envied Hassan for being
like the son his father wished he had, and his father for loving Hassan more
than his own son. Furthermore, Amir’s wishing of tragedy onto orphans even more
shows the extent to which jealousy cuts you off from other humans. Because of
Amir's jealousy, he ruined three relationships. Amir and Baba's relationship
was ruined because Amir made up lies makeing Hassan look bad. Hassan and Amir’s
relationship was ruined because of the jealousy of the traits that Hassan had
that Amir would never have, such as loyalty and respect. Amir ruined his
relationship with his father because he tried to hard to get Baba to accept and
love him.
